I hope my experience can help you become free of being controlled by the extreme up and down the mind.
I was a very active person. I didn’t like staying at home and I didn’t oversleep on holidays or be lazy at home. I always went out to meet my friends, learned something new, and spent time shopping.🚗
I thought that was my nature, and I liked that way of activity. But one day when I had to stay at home, inevitably, I had to face myself. I couldn’t accept the situation comfortably and I hated to face myself. When I was alone in my room, somewhere deep in my heart, negative, anxious, and unpleasant feelings would come up.
I could accept only myself who was active and I couldn’t accept myself who was lazy and negative. As time went by, I had to face myself who was negative and dark. I would hide more and more often to avoid facing myself. This only led to suppressing myself even more strongly.
From some point on, I lost interest in everything and my body became as heavy as a mountain. Although I didn’t catch a cold, I was often sick and I had to lie down and do nothing. It seemed like all the circumstances in my life were coming to me so I could accept myself who was lazy and negative. So I suffered from severe depression.🌕🌗🌚
Meditation helped me realize what I couldn’t admit about myself was false. I became free from my oppressed mind which is false. The cause of all the problems was my mind that distinguished between what is good and bad. I thought a diligent and active mind was a good thing and I thought it was bad to be lazy and not move. The suppressed mind I thought was bad was shadowed as I only acknowledged the mind I thought was good.
When I learned the mind cannot be separated into good or bad things, I was able to go out and interact with people, learn something new, and enjoy my own time quietly without fear. The dark night which I rejected and hated so much became truly beautiful and I was grateful as the dawn broke after the darkness. Looking at beautiful flowers, it feels delightful to watch them seed, germinate and blossom at a glance.🌱🌷🌺
Meditation helped me not to look at things in a single aspect. Meditation gave me a present – the world of Truth. I thought it was strange that even those who were born into rich families and lived as rich people all their lives were not truly happy. I learned why through meditation. They never experienced not having, so they couldn’t enjoy the abundance of what they had.
In this way, I have become grateful for all the negative hearts, darkness, hatred, resentment, anxiety, and fear I have experienced, and I no longer have repulsion to those feelings.
There is no more depression because I have found true freedom and happiness. Happiness and unhappiness coexist, and they are one.
Ever since I’ve found a mind in me that can accept everything. I can handle it without being controlled by it, without refusing and pressing it against others face-to-face.
If you find a true mind that makes you free from your emotions, you will see that depression is no longer a devil or a disease, but a grateful friend who helped you find your true mind.🙂
I would like to share this video with you: