As you do, I had the same question.
I thought love without hate was perfect love, and I pursued it. But it was more difficult than I thought.
I went to the meditation center. My mind was so complicated that I couldn’t understand the instructor’s lecture properly, but I was led by the fact that what he said didn’t bother me at all.
Instead of giving me the answer, this meditation only guided me to empty my mind. As I felt that my mind was getting lighter little by little, I was able to relax.
In becoming free in my mind, I became more flexible in the way I perceive the world and myself. I felt strength and hope to live truly.
Then, I realized that the love I was pursuing was a means to turn away my anxiety and dissatisfaction.
I tried to cover my problem with something from the outside, but I felt fortunate that I didn’t go in the wrong direction.
It was the moment when my dissatisfaction turned into gratitude. Like that, I have experienced many times when the misfortune turned into luck.
“I thought I was unlucky, but I was lucky?!”
It was just that my world changed as my perspective changed.
I continued my meditation journey, focusing only on letting go of the false mind inside me.
One day I found myself no longer longing for love, and I was able to meet my authentic self anytime, anywhere.
“I can’t believe I’m so comfortable without wanting! I’m unfamiliar with myself but I like it.”
The love we are talking about is the idea of love in the human mind. It is love defined to satisfy my needs and desires, so love and hate exist at the same time.
Meeting my needs is love, otherwise it quickly turns into hate.
My questions came from within, and my answers were also within.
As the number of answers obtained by recovering the true mind increased, love was naturally filled within me, not from outside.
So, at least, I became more inclined to give love rather than to receive it.
I still sometimes have negative thoughts or get annoyed. However, it is merely my natural response to unexpected situations. I don’t linger in it, and where I always return is the original place, where there is no distinction between love and hate.
Wishing you true love, not one that turns into hurt.