A straight answer would be TODAY makes me very happy today.
But let me tell you why is that.
I was never truly happy before, growing up as a child, teenager or adult. I was not a reach person but I always had money to do the things I wanted to do and I always did, so I was never lacking or being short of something. From outside it looked like i am happy and many people told me that they are envious of me and the life I lead, they were wishing to be happy like me. And I also was telling everyone that I was very happy and I was actually acting like I was very happy.
But the sad truth was that nobody could see how I was feeling on the inside. Everyone was fooled by appearances, what they could see from outside and what I was pretending and telling them. Nobody could see how sad and lonely I was Inside. Nobody could see behind my fake smile and fake words how empty I was feeling inside.
All the things I was doing, buying and traveling were making me feel a bit happier for a few hours or days, but there was nothing out there to bring me or give me lasting happiness. And at the end of this short feeling of happiness I had to start again searching for new things or ways to make me feel again a little happier. I could see that I was living my life in a big lie as a slave and depended to things to make me a again and again a little happier.
My older brother recomandat me to try meditation, he was into meditation all his life and always talked to me about meditation. But I thought that meditation was for spiritual people and I was not a spiritual person and I was not interested in spirituality. But as I was growing older year by year, my unhappiness, sadness and loneliness was also growing bigger and bigger inside me, and this made me think seriously about it and I decided that it is time to change something. I didn’t know what else to do to find the lasting happiness so I tried my hand at meditation.
I realised that there are so many different kinds of meditations out there, and I have tried many of them. But after 5 years of doing many different types of meditation I was still not happy. I was getting even more frustrated because now I started to pretend even more. I couldn’t shout when I was angry, I couldn’t express it when I was not happy because people think that if you meditate you have to be like a buddha statue, you cannot do that, you can’t say that, you cannot act like that, you have to be like that, etc, etc… so I couldn’t disappoint the people around me and I started to pretend to be like a buddha statue. This created a lot of contradiction, disappointment and more unhappiness inside me and I was getting desperate.
While I was sitting in meditation I was feeling good but the moment I came out into the world, my unhappiness was back. And life is to live in the world, with people around us and accepting everyone and everything as it is. Life is not isolating away from the world sitting crossed legs and imagining things, watching our breath or staring at a candle light. I couldn’t find happiness or meaning in doing all this things.
So I was still searching for happiness when by a lucky chance I came across a meditation method that taught me, not only the True Happiness is inside us but how to find it. My meditation guide told me that to find the True Happiness within, first we need to find the things that are making us unhappy, that are also inside us, and discard them.
I registered and started meditation straight away. My meditation guide guided me to reflect on my mind at my life i lived. And as I reflected on my mind I could see how I lived all my life and found all the things that were making me unhappy.
So wat were the things that made me unhappy?
- Expectations and Selfishness. I always had high expectations, even when I was helping others I was actually doing it for myself. I always expected something back, even if it was a thank you. And ofcourse when we have expectation we get hurt because the world doesn’t revolve around our expectations and from there big disappointment comes and therefore we become unhappy.
- Judgemental. I always judged everyone and everything. Everything they were doing or saying, everything was happening in the world or around me, nothing was perfect and nothing suited my mind, my standards. I couldn’t accept everyone and things as they are, and this made me very unhappy.
- Comparing myself with others. I always compared myself with others. I always wanted to be like others, to have what others have. I didn’t like the way I was and always wanted to be like someone or something else. And ofcourse this made me always very unhappy.
- Hatred. I always hated and resented everyone and everything that didn’t agree with me and my standards or conceptions. And of course I couldn’t accept this and I couldn’t be happy.
- Anxiety, stress, worries, negativity, annoyance, inferiority, anger, enemy, irritation, intimidation, guilt, attachments, envy, jealousy, ignorance, obsession, greed, desires, claim, selfishness, conceptions, pride, habits, honor, fame, indecision, laziness, concern about what others think, fear of being insulted, desire to be recognized, desire to avoid, negative mind, dishonest mind, impatient mind, self-rationalization, all this kind of minds I found inside my mind. And of course having all this negative, selfish and self-centred minds inside me, there was no room for happiness.
Now I realized why I couldn’t be happy but my meditation guide told me that just realizing this is not enough. By realizing it makes you more aware but will not make you happy. The true everlasting happiness lays hidden beyond all this minds and to reach it, you have to remove, cleanse and discard all these minds. To find True Happiness means to find your True Self. You cannot be happy if the old self remains. Only by finding and becoming your True Self, you can be Always Everyday Truly Happy.
Just like when we realize that we have something inside us, it is not enough just to know that there is pooh inside us. If we don’t do something about it, we are going to be in a lot of pain and get sick and can die, so we must go to the toilet and push it out of us. And how good and lighter we feel after we push the unnecessary things out of our bodies? You all know right?
The same we have to do with our mind. We have to take out all of these unnecessary things out of our mind in order to be liberated, free and Truly Happy.
Then my meditation guide taught me and guided me through the meditation method to discard and let go of all these minds. I started to meditate diligently every day and the more I was cleansing and emptying my mind the more I could accept people and situations around me just as they are. I start to notice things that I couldn’t accept before now they seem like just a banal thing.
As I continued to cleanse and discard my minds, my consciousness started to grow and I could see the world from a different perspective – the perspective of the Universe, which is our origin – our True Self. I could see that we are not different, we are not separate – we are all one. I could see that when I was judging, blaming and hating the world and others, I was judging, blaming and hating no one else but myself. And that was the root cause of my suffering and unhappiness.
In order to find the True Everlasting Happiness, we need to cleanse our minds and find our True Self that is beyond any expectations, conceptions or believes. Finding our True Self is Happiness itself.
Now that I have found my True Self that is eternal, I’m always everyday happy. Happiness is not something that you can keep it for yourself, happiness is to be shared and to share my happiness with others. I have become a meditation guide and am helping people to find True Lasting Happiness within.
I realized that meditation is not for spiritual people anymore. Meditation is a way of life, and if we want to be Truly Happy always, through the right meditation method we need to cleanse and discard all the things that makes us unhappy from within our minds, than we can find our True Happy Self.
So the answer is: Because there is no yesterday and no tomorrow and I don’t depend on someone or something to make me happy, everyday is happiness itself. This doesn’t mean we separate and isolate from others, it means that we become one, caring for each other, understanding and helping each other, it means we coexist together as one and this is True Happiness.
So TODAY made me Very Very happy because I have the chance to help others, and their happiness makes me very very Happy.
I wish that you all can find your True Eternal Self that is always happy.
This video inspired me a lot so I hope it can also inspire you.